What are healthy boundaries? You tell me, since the truth is, there are no boundaries, healthy or otherwise.
This came to me while reading about the Solar System. We used to think the edge of the Solar System was somewhere just beyond Pluto, a planet shaped object in the Kuiper Belt. But then we figured out there's an Oort Cloud, and way beyond that, the magnetosphere of Brother Sun. What I was reading was an article about Voyager, which they believe still has not reached interstellar space. This is hotly contested in the astronomical world. Some think Voyager has left the solar system, others disagree. There might be a layer beyond the magnetosphere. Whether or not there's another layer, what's clear is that there isn't a well defined edge of the Solar System.
My thoughts returned from interstellar space to remember it's electromagnetism that keeps us from merging one into the other, that keeps us from plunging to the center of the earth. Electromagnetism creates the illusion of separation and solidity where none exists. Our minds do the rest.
We think of the skin as a boundary, but it's porous. You can put on a patch to deliver certain medicines through the skin. We sweat. There really is no hard boundary between us and the rest of the biosphere of the earth and the sun. We are the earth. We are nature. We are Brother Sun.
Because there are no boundaries, our minds create them. We are storytellers who like beginnings and endings, the boundaries of time. The edges of my body and the layers of my energy field are real to me. I consciously focus on the perimeter of my body and energy field as part of my daily practice. I believe acknowledging my edges is orienting and keeps me more centered. This, even though I created those edges in my mind.
We love the idea of boundaries so much, defining our bodies is not enough. We draw circles around chunks of the landscape. We call the chunks cities, states, territories, countries, empires. It is so absurd. We are one world now, we must find another way. We don't live ON the earth, IN a particular country or city. We ARE the earth, inextricable, with no boundaries except in our minds.
We aren't the only animal that creates boundaries. Territorial behavior exists in many species. There are no boundaries but we create them. We need them, sometimes for better, sometimes for worse. So interesting to think about.
The term "healthy boundaries" usually refers to relationships and territorial concerns, how much give and take is appropriate, helpful and mutually beneficial. What's healthy fluctuates and evolves. No wonder it's so hard to identify them!
The mind is powerful. It is not all-powerful, probably a good thing. We need definition, even if it's a construct. Oh man. Being a human is so complicated!